5 Ways to Boost Your Self Esteem

1. Make A “You” List With Friend(s)

Ask a few friends to make a list of things they love about you. Respond by writing downfive things you love about yourself, and send it to your friends. Have your pals write five more things they love about you. Repeat ad infinitum. I started this recently with my best friend, who went through a breakup last month. We were talking about things she loves in her personality one day, and she was like, “I should write some of these things down.” Later that night, I did just that: I took five minutes to jot down five things about her that I love in an email, and sent it over. Don’t be shy to ask friends to help in this endeavor — and you can repay the favor too.

2. Ask Yourself Questions To Make A List Of Your Best Attributes

Perhaps you’re feeling so down in the dumps that you can’t even think of five things you love about yourself. It happens! So, as a precursor to the last suggestion, ask yourself questions about your character to yield a list of your most special qualities. They don’t have to be insanely remarkable: The fact that you make a killer apple pie is just as important as your ability to make even the grumpiest old curmudgeon smile. Give yourself queries such as “What have people complimented me on in the past?” “What are my talents?” “What do I feel happiest doing?” This is a great way to think of your loveliest traits, but also a good exercise in and of itself: Self-discovery is vital in the quest for higher confidence.

3. To Gain Self-Esteem, Do Estimable Acts

Someone once related this adage to me, and it stuck with me. If you’re gloomy, do something to raise your opinion of yourself — and your spirits. Volunteer at a soup kitchen, help a friend move, pay your mother a visit, ask what you can do to help someone else. It’ll get your mind off yourself, and produce more self-respect in the process.

4. Go On Dates

If you’re single, dates can be wonderful self-esteem boosters. That is, if you look at them in the right light. Don’t expect second dates — just see the dates themselves as fun and validating. Someone thinks you’re worthy of an hour (or three) of their time. You think the same of them. This is a nice agreement in mutual interestingness. If it goes further than that, cool. But most first dates aren’t followed by repeat events, and that’s totally cool.

If you’re in a relationship, putting on your favorite clothes and going on a fun adventure with your love is a great way to get a little self-esteem kick. Not only does dressing your best make you feel better about yourself, intimacy and human connection always feels good — and if you plan the date and treat your partner, you’ll feel awesome about yourself afterward.

5. Masturdate

Get your mind out of the gutter: I said ”masturdate,” and it’s a great way to do something nice for yourself, which’ll make yourself feel loved and important. Masturdating is just a fun way of referring to a solo date. Whether you take yourself to the movies, eat at your favorite restaurant or go to the beach, alone time is necessary. Plus, a masturdate is just for you, and it reinforces the idea that you’re valuable. Hello, self-esteem uplift!